Resembling a female person

I have bought shoes. I have bought pants, which pants have flared bottoms and this beady shit all over the right lower leg from knee to ankle. Which makes them very difficult to sit in, as I always sit with my right leg curled up under me. * So I can't do that in them and have to sit like an adult person. And a shirt with a hood (in Dutch it is a capuchon, which is much more hip, don't you think?) and even a denimn jacket which is very closely fitted and has lapels out to there and very long french cuffs and really cries out to be worn over a really fluffy skirt, maybe even a petticoat if I can find one. I replaced my makeup, all of which was older than my eldest child. I even painted my freaking nails, and not a french manicure but a frosted dark rose color. And I took Nel with me shopping, which means none of it cost that much (Nel has a terrible allergy to paying retail and will go to almost any lengths to avoid it).

It's all hip, and it's mostly colorful. Not through any fault of mine but because I now wear a girls' size in clothing and they do not apparently make girls' clothes in frumpy. At least not where Nel shops. Alas.

I suppose, after about six years, it is high time I began to resemble a female person in some way. I may even actually wear the shirt my sister gave me, though it has a neckline with goes right down to my navel and not, let's face it, very much else. And I have no, er, line to put in it. Which brought Nel to the subject of my undergarments which are a scandal I am given to understand except for one dark blue set (thank you, sister #3 ) and one purple set (thank you, sister # 1).

To prevent my sisters' bursting out with tell-all stories of my unrelieved frumpiness, may I just say that I was never a clothes horse, okay? I miss uniforms, to tell you the truth, at least all I had to worry about was whether they were clean. I enjoyed the uniform aspect of being a lawyer. (The good news is, tailored in in this fall, so I get to wear all my suit jackets again, lol). However, even I must admit that beginning with the cycle of preganant, nursing, pregnant, nursing, chasing Very Dirty Boys I have exceeded even myself in frumpiness.

I am unrelievedly lazy in matters of appearance. No matter what I do, I shall never hold a tiny candle to the roaring bonfires that are my lovely sisters, so I have thus far settled for Cleans Up Nicely. ** Well, I do clean up nicely. I am presentable, I rarely actually embarrass anyone. But you know, I mostly Just Don't Care.

However, I just want to say to my Very Fashionable Sisters (and you know who you are) that I have for the past six days actually worn at least one completely pointless accessory item every single day (apart from my wedding ring, I mean). Sometimes even more than one. I even tied a bloody scarf around my neck which irritated me no end but did look very nice, so I did not impatiently yank it off and stick it in my pocket after 20 minutes as usual, lol. And I have worn at least some form of entirely purposeless artificial pigmentation on my face every single day as well. ***

So there. I shall next go out and buy a pair of purple suede boots with fringe on them and revive the Stevie Nicks look. Oh, maybe not, I am really too short to pull off all that hangly dangly stuff. And also too impatient.

* Because I am too short for a regular size chair and my feet do not reach the ground in them, which problem was not improved by moving to the Land of the Giants, that's why.

**I trust you ladies will remember this comment come Christmas.

*** And to my worry wart father I would like to add that this was in addition to the sunscreen, which I really do actually wear due to our shared genetic legacy of a certain absence of natural pigmentation, lol